Open for a little bit FOOTBALLLLLLLLLLL!
Thursday night time’s NFL kickoff will characteristic ‘America’s Team’ taking over defending champion Tampa Bay Buccaneers, and even Ed Sheeran for some motive.
There might be red-hot NFL motion for every of the subsequent 21 weeks, so for those who’ve turn out to be a fantasy fan of your mates, are planning to become involved for some time or simply need one thing to observe on a Sunday night time, here is yours one-stop store to tie your Premier League group to an NFL franchise.
Arsenal – Dallas Cowboys
The Dallas Cowboys are probably the most well-known collection within the NFL, however they’ve not made it to the NFC Championship since 1995, however they’ve by no means reached the Super Bowl. Arsenal’s battle has not lasted that lengthy, nevertheless it’s an actual chord that’s being fought with the large model / dangerous earnings correlation – and the undeniable fact that the dangerous outcomes must do with proudly owning outdated American billionaires / doable vampires. Oh, and everybody thinks it is enjoyable once they’s dangerous
Cowboys house owners Jerry Jones and Stan Kroenke change recommendations on methods to drain individuals’s vitality / Kevork Djansezian / Getty Images
Aston Villa – San Francisco 49ers
Good within the 70s and 80s, completely cardboard for some time, now a bit energetic once more.
Brentford – Carolina Panthers
This yr is to construct and stabilize. It’s sort of like that, you actually wouldn’t have a “first season back in the top flight of over 70 years of teams in the NFL, so a consequence is … challenging.
Brighton – Pittsburgh Steelers
Impeccably coached. Very well organized. But if any of these teams will win anything right now, it will be by stopping their opponent from scoring instead of scoring their own.
Burnley – Denver Broncos
See: Steelers, Pittsburgh. But with poorer teaching.
Chelsea – Baltimore Ravens
Both teams have fantastic offensive talent (hello Romelu Lukaku, hello Lamar Jackson, hello Kai Havertz), but these attacks highlight the true title-fighting relevance of stacked, well-drilled defensive units.
Crystal Palace – New York Giants
They’re both from the biggest cities in their countries, that’s good! They both suck. It’s bad.
Giants QB Daniel Jones, tired of playing for the team, plays dead in hopes of being caught for a little lie / Mike Stobe / Getty Images
Everton – LA Chargers
There is no football team that is better at getting its way than Everton. There is no football team that is better at getting its way than the chargers. They are not bad as such, but almost biblically bad in close matches, with a near divine ability to miss short field goals in important moments. The 2010 Chargers may have been the best team for a season ever to play the game … and when this Secret Base video ends, they did not even reach the playoffs. Everton, that.
Leeds United – Buffalo Bills
Before was very good. Disappeared in nothing for most of the 2000s so far. Fanbase known for knocking out numbers and getting rowdy. Got a new head coach a few years ago and is … good again? You’re damn right Leeds are the Bills.
Leicester City – Seattle Seahawks
Both took their maiden titles in the mid-2010s and have continued to make smart signings to stay in the conversation near the top of their respective sports ever since. Leicester have made a quarter-final every season since winning the title, winning the FA Cup, while the Seahawks have made playoffs in six of the seven seasons since winning the Super Bowl. Bonus Factoid: Remember the Chargers team that missed the 2010 playoffs even though it was perhaps the best team cover ever? That same year, the Seahawks entered the playoffs with seven wins and nine defeats — the worst record ever to get a berth after the season. Sports are weird.
The Seahawks have literally never played in a normal game.
– Kevin Clark (@bykevinclark) November 12, 2019
Liverpool – Kansas City Chiefs
Both had ever so little disappointing 2020/21 seasons for various reasons, but high octane attacks were based on lightning pace and a lot of game-breaking talent? Yes, that’s about right.
Manchester City – LA Rams
Sean McVay and Pep Guardiola are the identical individual.
Manchester United – New England Patriots
The two nice evil empires of their respective sports activities. Who else might it have been ?!
Newcastle United – Cleveland Browns
Brown’s fans are one of the most tortured fan bases in the NFL, Newcastle fans are … you see where this is going. It’s been battle after battle for this pair for years, and Cleveland’s modern QB situation (remember DeShone ’15 starts, 15 losses’ Kizer?) Is strikingly similar to Newcastle’s striker after Shearer. We can also call this team the Newcastle Browns, and everyone has a nice reminder of the best tire sponsor from the Premier League.
Bring. The. Back. / Getty Images / Getty Images
Norwich – Cincinnati Bengals
Southampton – Houston Texans
Seemed to build real momentum as recently as a year or two ago, but a couple of catastrophic losses (Southampton’s 9-0s, Houston going 24-0 against the Chiefs in the playoffs and losing 51-31) will go down as symbolizing each page death.
Tottenham Hotspur – Chicago Bears
Both have claimed to be good “huge groups” thanks to their historic successes and places, and no one has actually won things since the ’80s. Each team 2018/19 — a record of 12-4 for the Bears, the Champions League final for the Spurs — was more of an aberration than a trend.
Watford – New York Jets
You know how Watford often end up in the London team, even though they are not actually in London? Well, the New York Jets play in New Jersey. They are also both bad teams. Honesty pays, children.
West Ham – Atlanta Falcons
Oh, these fans love their teams. While their new stadiums both have problems (London Stadium is not a football pitch, Mercedes Benz Stadium looks like a butt), fans are passionate and the team … has never won the big one.
This stadium hosted the Super Bowl a couple of years ago, you know / Streeter Lecka / Getty Images
Wolves – Detroit Lions
What can there be to say about this Wolves team? What can there be to say about this Lions team? None of them are good, none of them have any kind of intrigue at all, and no fan of another team has any opinion about their achievements at all. Only two gaps in the form of sports teams.
For extra from Chris Deeley, comply with him on Twitter at @ ThatChris1209